gr[a/e]y matter

when it comes to certain words, i've always spelled my own way when my alternative was also correct. yes, i was that kid who, when she got one out of twenty spelling words wrong because she wrote t-h-e-a-t-r-e instead of t-h-e-a-t-e-r, promptly got up out of her seat while the teacher was talking, grabbed the dictionary, looked up the proper spelling, showed the now-very-annoyed teacher the validity of her answer, & didn't sit down until she got her point back.

i still spell that word that way. & i will always write g-r-e-y. i can't stand doing otherwise. i don't like having to handle multiple possibilities, none or all of which may be right. & you know the funny thing? this discomfort is completely ridiculous because, often, certainty is an illusory concept.

the irrepressible desire to chop my locks

does the feeling of being ten pounds lighter translate 1-for-1 to the scale, or is that just wishful thinking?

on the mediated self[ie]: this is who me is.

usually, this is me, first thing in the morning. if you're going to wake me this early, you'd better have a 10 gallon mug of coffee ready for me to chug. if you don't, may God have mercy on your soul.

weight... just weight (part2: the now)

**resuming "weight... just weight (part1: the history)"

weight... just weight (part1: the history)

i may take some heat for this one, as some lady friends/family/acquaintances may feel targeted. however, rather than an indictment, this is a lament. i am sad for my sisters.

hurt.

my tag for today's run? "solace."

in truth, it was anything but.

loudmouth

finally getting some rain here, & if all goes well, that will help break the heat. had become sick recently because of the high temps, & i'd vastly curtailed my normal activity, just to prevent a joyride to the local ER. anyway, i made the mistake of getting super-reflect-y, with the storm & piano music as background. as a consequence, i slipped into a mood. this is my best at digging out again.